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Writer's pictureKelly Ballard

Learning to Grow Through What You Go Through

Everything you go through, grows you. It’s true, right -- gosh at least I hope it is! One thing I do know for sure is that EVERYTHING we experience changes us. The good, the bad, the ugly, and everything in between that we experience each and every day shapes us into the soul that we were put here to be. And sometimes we handle those experiences with more grace than others, but at the end of the day it’s part of the great journey.


"Grow Through What You Go Through: Focusing on the Outcome Rather Than the Obstacles When Life Happens.“ ~ Fred Famble

While I didn’t intend this message to be around reflecting upon the last year of our lives, as I’ve been sitting down attempting to write with Spirit for the last two weeks, the only words that began to flow were reflections and support about just that. I think that perhaps there’s a part of me that doesn’t want to replay moments, memories, events, and struggles of the last year, if I’m honest. And while I promise you that I’ll be the forever optimist and always dig deep to find the good in just about every situation -- I go back to a simple statement -- the last 365 days of our lives were a lot to take in, in the least.


And while no person’s struggles are any more or less rough than anyone else’s (because they’re our own, after all), the key question I keep coming back to from Spirit here is HOW do we allow these experiences to change us for the better? How you perceive and react to the situations and experiences in your life has a direct impact on your ability to create life changes -- real, serious, powerful changes -- so you can live your most authentic, beautiful, and joyful life. Call it -- the power of perception.


Engaging in the power of perception, this is your chance to grow, learn, and become something more -- engaging in this energy gives you the chance to widen your view, expand yourself, and become a better version of you! And listen, not that anything is wrong with the present day you, but we are all beautiful works in progress, and should want to grow into our best selves. Whether you adopt a “can-do” attitude, focus on those positive vibes, or allow that “water off a ducks back” ideology -- any of those can offer you a less drama-filled existence.


Is changing your perception easy? Absolutely not, we all need to start somewhere to feel the peace and freedom of knowing you are in control and can choose to react in a different way than you’ve been conditioned to react. Once you have felt this freedom, changing your perception becomes easier and easier. Below are a few easy and gentle thoughts on shifting that perception -- and while none of those can change the loss, pain, grief, trauma, and frustrations of the last 365 days -- I am choosing to find ways to shift my reactions, always choose joy, and hope that my choices will lovingly rub off on others for support and help as well.


See if any of these resonate with you:

  • Take a past or present impactful negative experience and write down all of the changes it brought you through. Next, make a note after each change describing what you learned from the change. Is it possible that these changes may have actually been a growing experience designed to bring you more fully into your life’s path?

  • Find the positive in one negative situation and know it happened for an important reason, whether you understood the reason at the time or not. **Gentle side note for those of you who are ready to dig deep; this step tends to have more success when a past negative experience has had enough time to fully play out.** Sometimes negative things happen to open our eyes, heart, and mind to bring us into a more aware, present, and joyful existence.

  • When a negative situation arises, do not respond quickly. Step back for a moment, see the situation from different angles (perceptions), and gather your thoughts before you make a quick decision or mistaken judgment.

  • Before you speak or perform any important action, stop and think what the long term effects of your decisions and actions have on the situation, and what the impact will be on your life or the lives of those around you. If a situation feels negative, before you react, project your mind forward a bit and see what positive changes might come from this negative situation, so that you can better adjust your thinking before responding.

If you want to make positive changes in your life, YOU (and that beautiful, divine soul of yours) are the only one who has control over changing YOUR perception! Your life is not decided by luck or fate -- that I can tell you for sure! It is guided by your thoughts, words, emotions, and beliefs. I continue to hold space for each of you and your loved ones daily -- YOU *can* create and shift your beautiful life now!

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